Founded by Michael Murphy and Dick Price, The Esalen Institute in Big Sur has been a driving force in the shaping and exploration of culture and consciousness since 1962.
The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, Alan Watts, Jack Kerouac, Aldous Huxley, Terrence McKenna, Ida Rolf, Abraham Maslow, Joseph Campbell, Joan Baez, Ansel Adams, John C. Lilly, Deepak Chopra, and Stanislav Grof are just some of the many magical people to have studied, taught, lived and played there . . .
February 27, 2038
We live in a world where people live symbiotically with nature. We value our harmony with all other entities. We recognize that there is nothing to extract, and only everything to share. Energy transfers from one form to another and from one set of hands to the next. We do not own, but instead temporarily hold . . .
“My intention is love, heal, explore, surrender, celebrate, be, gratitude, play.”
Alder passes me the hummingbird pipe as Morgan sets an intention and blesses me with sage.
I inhale the N,N-DMT smoke derived from Jurema before gasping more air.
“Hold it deep in your lungs with stillness,” Alder says.
I hold full lungs for 60 seconds before a warming sensation and buzzing sound fills half of my consciousness. I exhale a pleasurable sigh.
Alder torches the pipe once more as I lift it to my mouth for a second inhalation . . .
Toronto. 2013. Age 25.
I was taking everything so seriously that I stopped getting boners and considered putting a bullet in my brain.
I was working as the vice president of an advertising agency, the co-founder of a startup in the gaming industry, and was training intensely ten or more times each week.
I wanted to serve my clients, launch a successful company and attain financial freedom. I wanted to achieve a one-arm handstand, a one-arm chin-up and a 400-pound squat. I wanted to be at my peak every moment of my life.
I was going to bed early, so that I could wake up early. I had amazing friends, but it became difficult to share quality time with them. After all, I had to rise at 7 a.m to work on my handstand. And, I had to ensure that I had proper nutrition and sleep to get the most out of my training.
If I was tired, I had to push through and work harder. There’s no such thing as overtraining. There’s only undertraining, I thought. Plus, I don’t deserve more rest. I spend eight to ten hours per day at a standing desk. That’s rest enough, I told myself, ignoring the fact that I was orchestrating client advertising strategies and trying to launch a startup during those hours.
While I ate, I listened to educational and self-development podcasts. When I had openings in my schedule, I read books, or I trained strength and mobility for a third time that day. All so that I could do more, accomplish more, and be more.
Recently, I've been asked about the practices I use to live a liberated life. I've been asked a number of times, so I've created this post as a means of sharing for anyone who's interested:
To live a liberated life, I think one best focus on oneself.
When we love ourselves deeply by cultivating an infinite amount of self love, we feel whole. As expressions of the same oneness, I find that when I feel whole (which I am), all feels whole.
I think we need to be uncompromising in the love we express to ourselves. I'll share with you some of the practices and tools I use to do so:
Note to the Reader: ketamine is a charged word for some. Prior to 2015, I only had negative connotations with the medicine. I thought of it as a dirty drug and never considered trying it.
Following extensive conversations and research in early 2015, I decided to try the medicine with some friends.
Wow.
At the time, it was the most ineffable experience of my life. My friends and I telepathically synchronized and were able to know things about one another that we hadn't discussed. There was much more to the experience, but I’ll leave that alone for now.
Ketamine is currently being studied in clinical and therapeutic settings. The medicine offers a promising approach to the treatment of depression, PTSD, and other psychological conditions. Furthermore, the medicine has a history of providing transformative personal experiences.
Now, for my story: Ketamine, Kechari Mudra, Meteors and Samadhi:
One of the most important aspects of our being—something that will help all of us realize our highest and most authentic selves—is misunderstood by 99% of people.
The thing I’m talking about is movement.
Movement is one of the most foundational elements to health and happiness. Exploring the realms of physicality expands our consciousness. The world begins to feel more like a playground, and life more like a dance.
In modern culture, many people feel limited by their physical vessels, but that need not be the case. You're navigating three-dimensional reality in a spaceship called the body. And, the body is your gift! Your gift to experience, play with, and explore . . .
There is no human endeavour not enhanced by the freedom that comes with a healthy and able body. Each day, we are given the opportunity to expand our movement capacity.
Light turns to dark, and we all make our way to a big campfire. Tiki torch and candle flames dance as the scent of Palo Santo fills the air and our nostrils. Soft colourful lights bathe the trees with purples and blues, while a starry night sky and the brilliant half moon decorate our imaginations. The sound system surrounds the space.
I lie down on a blanket, and the sound check alone has people in a meditative trance.
Eduardo sits cross-legged at a low table with candles, a laptop, mixing equipment and microphone before he invites us on a journey.
“Thank you for this special experience everyone. All of it and all of you are truly magic,” he says. “I invite you to get comfortable, lie down, and imagine that you’re in your living room. I’m going to play some music for you. It’s all improvised, and I’m really honoured to share this. Patience will be your friend. I encourage you not to expect anything to happen. Simply relax and allow."
The most ineffable, complete experience, and the biggest release of my life.
Total dissolution of ego; Oneness, Infinity, Love.
Enjoy the video <3
Over the summer solstice, I ventured out of town to celebrate two of my dear friends Pandora and Joanna's birthdays in the form of an Alice-In-Wonderland-esque tea party.
A bunch of brilliant, beautiful and loving women dressed in sexy fishnets and skirts, and a group of brilliant and loving men dressed like mad hatters and Burners partook in the celebration.
I took one tab of LSD with the intention of love, abundance, and bliss. And, oh my goodness . . .
What if everything is the opposite--or, at least radically different--than what we perceive it to be?
What if, instead of human beings being the creator of computers, computers actually use us to create them?
What if, instead of human beings being the inventors of automobiles, we're actually being used by automobiles to birth them into existence?
We think that we domesticated wheat (during the agricultural revolution), but what if wheat actually domesticated humanity?
What if plant medicines, like Ayahuasca and mushrooms, are actually using humans to spread their consciousness and their species?
This video explores these questions and more.
For almost a year, I was caught in a cycle of constantly wanting to eat. I love food, and while I had no trouble maintaining my desired body composition, part of my mind was always on food. Most nights, I would overeat. I’d then compensate by fasting until the following afternoon.
I see tremendous benefits from fasting, but not as many benefits when the fasts consistently follow a period of overeating.
Since September, I haven’t overeaten once. I’ve released the behaviour. As my new eating tendencies become more ingrained, any desire to overeat dwindles away.
I feel lighter—physically and mentally, more agile, and while my weight remains the same, my body composition has improved. I’ve noticed some other profound developments as well:
1) I’m becoming increasingly synesthetic, especially with my perception of sound.
2) I’m experiencing the future in fragments prior to its arrival.
Let me dive into each a little further . . .
A little less than five years ago, I was afraid to go upside down against a wall.
Then, I met Ido Portal who showed me some foundational elements for working on the handstand.
Obsessively, I worked against a wall for two months before I even started trying to handstand without the wall.
Within six months, I held my first 60-second freestanding handstand. It was ugly, my line wasn't good, and I was shaking, but I got it.
I continued to obsess over the handstand for a total of 18 months: at least one hour per day, every single day, on top of any other movement training and the rest of my life . . .
(Video and article)
I rarely engage in political commentary on the Internet. Doing so most often seems to further polarize opposing parties, or serves as an echo chamber for those who already share similar ideas.
However, I was recently asked, “do you think the political system is broken?” Here's my response, which I hope inspires and harmonizes:
I think all of reality, including the political system, is the result of our collective consciousness. We literally dream this reality into existence. The current political landscape is a reflection of our inner thoughts and beliefs on a mass scale. And thus, any flaw in the political system is a flaw in us.
For example, I think Donald Trump is the manifestation . . .
Last night, I was experiencing great sadness. I woke up feeling heavy and sad, and then I meditated.
At first, I talked with myself and said, "everything is okay." I addressed all the concerns I had, acknowledged them, gave them love, and expressed to myself how each individual concern is going to be okay. It felt like I was my own father and mother taking care of myself. It felt like I was holding myself. It felt like I was holding a younger version of myself, like I was holding a little boy.
I meditated on love for a while. Loving myself. Loving everything. Filling both with love. I meditated on loving you. I meditated on loving friends. . .
A video recounting of a multi-dimensional and cosmic meditation during which I encounter spirit animals and other entities for a magical and orgasmic experience.
Some late night contemplations and the realization that nothing is impossible--with a slower cadence than usual :)
(Video)
Walking near my house, I become fully present. No past, no future. Just now.
I become totally observant and astounded by everything--seeing myself as all things and everything: as the tree, as the car, as the condo, as the cloud, as the flower, as the pebble on the driveway beside the aluminum trash can. I am all of these things experiencing themselves through the space in consciousness known as Michael Sanders.
The now. The moment. It's complete: nothing to want for.
I'm mesmerized by an air conditioner protruding from a 10th story apartment . . .
Here's the video story of the uplifting and upgrading hypnotic heart meditation my friend and brother Matt Belair guided me through.
A video account of a mushroom tea ceremony during which I encountered various conscious entities, experienced a collapse of all time and space, and merged the dream world with three-dimensional reality, amongst a whole host of other wonderful insights.
A video rendition of my experience at our Lovelution Valentine's Retreat. With the help of the 160 Bartley Dr. community in addition to all of our wonderful volunteers, the Retreat turned out to be the most beautiful celebration I've been a part of.
Video exploring the concepts of life being a game, free energy, the transcendence of currency, infinite abundance, simulation theory, peace, and the universe as a whole :)
A quick preview about Lovelution New Year's Eve (FIVE +) followed by a wonderful story about the origins of Lovelution (video).
No one’s enlightened until everyone’s enlightened.
We’re all connected. When the poor child in Africa starves, that is you who starves. When he struggles to survive, so do you, and thus, you aren’t enlightened until he is. We must all help each other.
There is no separation.
Reader’s note: On July 3, my friend Steph messaged me telling me to read Bringers of the Dawn by Barbara Marciniak, a book about the Pleiadians. Steph was insistent I read it, and based on the mind-blowing books she’s had me read in the past, I knew I’d indulge.
Another note: Dave is my best friend who died in a tragic accident October 17, 2010. Steph was dating Dave at the time.
Wow, Steph! I read the preface to Bringers of the Dawn (is that the title?) right before I fell asleep last night and I spent a week with Dave in my "dreams." So many of the guys from our crew got together to hang and we were all talking with Dave about his return (though, we weren't sure how long it would last). P Rob, Toman, Hammill, Darrin were there, and so were Dave's parents.
I spent a lot of time bonding and talking with Dave. It felt so awesome for both of us to hang out again, though we both acknowledged that we’re never really apart. The last thing I remember was asking him what death was like and did he remember. He smiled and said, "I don't remember, man," but with moist eyeballs and joy on his face, it was obvious that he felt something amazing towards death--that he was definitely having a beautiful time. . .
I met Justin Roy in the line at Electric Island a couple of Mondays ago. As soon as we made eye contact, we both knew we were going to be friends forever and that we were brothers who have known each other eternally. My roommate, Tim, had actually mentioned Justin to me a couple months prior: Tim had seen Justin DJ a Conscious Dance Party and had his mind blown.
Justin recently returned from Costa Rica where he concluded a transformative month-long adventure with three Ayahuasca ceremonies alongside his girlfriend Chrissy. His story is amazing, and he and I vibed immediately. We talked, danced, hugged and shared for the next six hours, recognizing tons of synchronicity along the way. He's releasing an album, and he's planning a crowdfunding campaign to launch a tour for his sound activation and shamanic dance parties. I had been looking for the second DJ for my book launch party (having already confirmed John Dill to play), and the universe aligned perfectly to show me Justin. . .
Click here to explore more blog posts, including older ones.
Have you had a similar experience? I woke up outside the simulation, and I'd love to connect with others who have as well.
Currently, Elon Musk and others are investing millions of dollars to see if we can break through the simulation. It'd be great to connect with them to discuss advancing this effort. Please share this video widely and comment with your feedback.