My friend Liam once shared with me something to the effect of, 'so long as you have hope, you'll keep going.'
This video is a story about the beauty and power of small acts of kindness.
Founded by Michael Murphy and Dick Price, The Esalen Institute in Big Sur has been a driving force in the shaping and exploration of culture and consciousness since 1962.
The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, Alan Watts, Jack Kerouac, Aldous Huxley, Terrence McKenna, Ida Rolf, Abraham Maslow, Joseph Campbell, Joan Baez, Ansel Adams, John C. Lilly, Deepak Chopra, and Stanislav Grof are just some of the many magical people to have studied, taught, lived and played there . . .
February 27, 2038
We live in a world where people live symbiotically with nature. We value our harmony with all other entities. We recognize that there is nothing to extract, and only everything to share. Energy transfers from one form to another and from one set of hands to the next. We do not own, but instead temporarily hold . . .
“My intention is love, heal, explore, surrender, celebrate, be, gratitude, play.”
Alder passes me the hummingbird pipe as Morgan sets an intention and blesses me with sage.
I inhale the N,N-DMT smoke derived from Jurema before gasping more air.
“Hold it deep in your lungs with stillness,” Alder says.
I hold full lungs for 60 seconds before a warming sensation and buzzing sound fills half of my consciousness. I exhale a pleasurable sigh.
Alder torches the pipe once more as I lift it to my mouth for a second inhalation . . .
Toronto. 2013. Age 25.
I was taking everything so seriously that I stopped getting boners and considered putting a bullet in my brain.
I was working as the vice president of an advertising agency, the co-founder of a startup in the gaming industry, and was training intensely ten or more times each week.
I wanted to serve my clients, launch a successful company and attain financial freedom. I wanted to achieve a one-arm handstand, a one-arm chin-up and a 400-pound squat. I wanted to be at my peak every moment of my life.
I was going to bed early, so that I could wake up early. I had amazing friends, but it became difficult to share quality time with them. After all, I had to rise at 7 a.m to work on my handstand. And, I had to ensure that I had proper nutrition and sleep to get the most out of my training.
If I was tired, I had to push through and work harder. There’s no such thing as overtraining. There’s only undertraining, I thought. Plus, I don’t deserve more rest. I spend eight to ten hours per day at a standing desk. That’s rest enough, I told myself, ignoring the fact that I was orchestrating client advertising strategies and trying to launch a startup during those hours.
While I ate, I listened to educational and self-development podcasts. When I had openings in my schedule, I read books, or I trained strength and mobility for a third time that day. All so that I could do more, accomplish more, and be more.
Have you had a similar experience? I woke up outside the simulation, and I'd love to connect with others who have as well.
Currently, Elon Musk and others are investing millions of dollars to see if we can break through the simulation. It'd be great to connect with them to discuss advancing this effort. Please share this video widely and comment with your feedback.
Note to the Reader: ketamine is a charged word for some. Prior to 2015, I only had negative connotations with the medicine. I thought of it as a dirty drug and never considered trying it.
Following extensive conversations and research in early 2015, I decided to try the medicine with some friends.
At the time, it was the most ineffable experience of my life. My friends and I telepathically synchronized and were able to know things about one another that we hadn't discussed. There was much more to the experience, but I’ll leave that alone for now.
Ketamine is currently being studied in clinical and therapeutic settings. The medicine offers a promising approach to the treatment of depression, PTSD, and other psychological conditions. Furthermore, the medicine has a history of providing transformative personal experiences.
Now, for my story: Ketamine, Kechari Mudra, Meteors and Samadhi:
Light turns to dark, and we all make our way to a big campfire. Tiki torch and candle flames dance as the scent of Palo Santo fills the air and our nostrils. Soft colourful lights bathe the trees with purples and blues, while a starry night sky and the brilliant half moon decorate our imaginations. The sound system surrounds the space.
I lie down on a blanket, and the sound check alone has people in a meditative trance.
Eduardo sits cross-legged at a low table with candles, a laptop, mixing equipment and microphone before he invites us on a journey.
“Thank you for this special experience everyone. All of it and all of you are truly magic,” he says. “I invite you to get comfortable, lie down, and imagine that you’re in your living room. I’m going to play some music for you. It’s all improvised, and I’m really honoured to share this. Patience will be your friend. I encourage you not to expect anything to happen. Simply relax and allow."
Over the summer solstice, I ventured out of town to celebrate two of my dear friends Pandora and Joanna's birthdays in the form of an Alice-In-Wonderland-esque tea party.
A bunch of brilliant, beautiful and loving women dressed in sexy fishnets and skirts, and a group of brilliant and loving men dressed like mad hatters and Burners partook in the celebration.
I took one tab of LSD with the intention of love, abundance, and bliss. And, oh my goodness . . .
For almost a year, I was caught in a cycle of constantly wanting to eat. I love food, and while I had no trouble maintaining my desired body composition, part of my mind was always on food. Most nights, I would overeat. I’d then compensate by fasting until the following afternoon.
I see tremendous benefits from fasting, but not as many benefits when the fasts consistently follow a period of overeating.
Since September, I haven’t overeaten once. I’ve released the behaviour. As my new eating tendencies become more ingrained, any desire to overeat dwindles away.
I feel lighter—physically and mentally, more agile, and while my weight remains the same, my body composition has improved. I’ve noticed some other profound developments as well:
1) I’m becoming increasingly synesthetic, especially with my perception of sound.
2) I’m experiencing the future in fragments prior to its arrival.
Let me dive into each a little further . . .
A little less than five years ago, I was afraid to go upside down against a wall.
Then, I met Ido Portal who showed me some foundational elements for working on the handstand.
Obsessively, I worked against a wall for two months before I even started trying to handstand without the wall.
Within six months, I held my first 60-second freestanding handstand. It was ugly, my line wasn't good, and I was shaking, but I got it.
I continued to obsess over the handstand for a total of 18 months: at least one hour per day, every single day, on top of any other movement training and the rest of my life . . .
(Video and article)
Walking near my house, I become fully present. No past, no future. Just now.
I become totally observant and astounded by everything--seeing myself as all things and everything: as the tree, as the car, as the condo, as the cloud, as the flower, as the pebble on the driveway beside the aluminum trash can. I am all of these things experiencing themselves through the space in consciousness known as Michael Sanders.
The now. The moment. It's complete: nothing to want for.
I'm mesmerized by an air conditioner protruding from a 10th story apartment . . .
Something incredible happened this morning.
I was walking to the park minutes after sunrise, thinking about all the synchronicity in my life: each and every day, I’m encountering events and people who inspire me with their energy, their essence and their willingness to be themselves, allowing us to form deep bonds within minutes of knowing one another. The interests and philosophies we share are so congruent that it’s as though we’ve known each other forever—and we probably have.
As I was contemplating all the synchronicity, I realized I hadn’t experienced anything particularly synchronous yesterday, and then an anecdote popped into my conscious awareness . . .
This excerpt is from a Burning Man Book that Sidney Smith and I created. Below recounts our Wednesday morning from Burning Man 2013:
A heart glows in the sky and a colourful Robot glows next to it. We pedal towards over a thousand bouncing bodies on a desert in space. We park our bikes amongst the others, lock them up and run into the place we’ve been looking for. The music enters through our ears and slides past the drums, creeps into and envelops our minds, pours down our neck and floods our heart, caressing it in robotic sounds, symbiotic with our biology, we are cyborgs: plugged into these electronic noises to power our legs, our hips, our knees, our feet, all our extremities. The sounds blast and the bass thumps, and every once in a while, we thrust and we jump. We grind and we move, we shift and we slide, and it’s all, ALL about the groove. We fly with capes, steer with driving gloves, bob with top hats, and see with hearts in and on our eyes. Extrapolate the four of us to include the thousands more, and the variety, the creativity, the energy, the expression is a sight to behold, and with everything we do, there is no reason to withhold. . .